Colon Cleaner Hot Sauce -  Hats off to Prof Phardtpounder. You’re an honest man. You live up to your word. My colon is now cleaned.  This sauce promises Capsaicin Extremus, and Capsaicin is the active agent in chili peppers that is also used in topical creams to release pain in joints. However, if pain relieving topical cream makes you run around the house begging someone to rip your tongue off and hose the rest of your mouth down with milk, then I’m not sure it’s working. But as a hot sauce, Colon Cleaner is top dog. No matter how much you enjoy heat, this Colon Cleanser is far beyond tolerable. Bet money on who can go the longest without needing a popsicle, and whoever can go 15 seconds will beat out the entire competition. The raging blaze of this sauce stays in your mouth as it is basically a Kryptonite to any heat represents. Continue Reading

Melinda’s Scotch Bonnet Hot Sauce - Who is this Melinda chick? She knows her sauces. I tried Melinda’s Coffee BBQ Sauce and found it to be an exceptional blend of flavors; I tried Melinda’s Naga Jolokia and absolutely fell in love with it. I’m not sure where the sauce artists that concoct these beauties comes from, but Melinda’s Scotch Bonnet his the third home run in a row.

The scotch bonnet is a very hot pepper in the same family as habaneros. It’s found primarily in the Caribbean. Although it’s hot, it has a subtle sweet undertone that makes it ideal for a number of foods and cooking applications. Continue Reading

Ass Reaper hot sauce – The bottle design alone is worth the price of admission on this sauce. Ass Reaper hot sauce comes with a black label that features a skeleton. There’s an actual black cloak tied around the bottle and the lid has a plastic skeleton head over it. The tag line for the sauce is “That’s your ass now.” If you choose to use this sauce irresponsibly, it will be your ass.

Habanero peppers, scotch bonnet peppers, and capsaicin resin and oil (in this case from a hot African pepper) make up the foundation of this sauce. The combination of habaneros and scotch bonnets would be enough to warrant warning. The other stuff is simply overkill.  Continue Reading

Hot sauce exists to add a little spice to your life.  In this how-to video, learn how to turn bonnet peppers into a very hot sauce mix. Do you dare enjoy?

Warning: This video may contain swears.

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As my mother would say, I’ma gonna give it to ya straight: Ass Reaper Hot Sauce is one of the hottest sauces I’ve ever experienced.  No, not THE hottest sauce, but as of right now, it’s in my top three.  Your first clue as to what’s to come is that the Ass Reaper Hot Sauce bottle comes dressed as the Grimm Reaper, with a white skull mask and a hooded robe tied to the neck of the bottle.  Just in time for Halloween?  Not a chance.  Wicked ominous?  Definitely.

The label is a simple design, a black background with white and red text.  The body of a skeleton takes up the majority of space, with “Ass Reaper” scrawled in red across the bony pelvis.  Continue Reading

Busha Browne’s Pukka Hot Pepper Sauce starts off with the pride and joy of the pepper world, in my humble opinion, the Jamaican Scotch Bonnet.

The Scotch bonnet pepper is a close relative of the habanero, with a Scoville heat rating between 100,000 and 350,000. Besides packing a powerful heat punch, the Scotch Bonnet has a taste as distinct as that of its habanero cousin.

Busha Browne’s Pukka Hot Pepper Sauce makes full use of the Scotch bonnet’s flavor characteristics. Continue Reading

What are the hottest peppers and how is it determined which one is the hottest? A method of testing peppers is called the Scoville test. This method of testing a pepper’s pungency units was invented by Wilbur Scoville in 1912. Mr. Scoville determined his test results by taking the extracts of many types of chili peppers and diluting them in a sugared water solution until none of the heat remained. The testing was accomplished by a panel of 5 “judges” who would taste these solutions and then tell Mr. Scoville when they no longer felt any heat. This testing was very subjective as your can imagine and results were not very consistent. The hottest peppers, such as habaneros, have a rating of 300,000 or more, indicating that their extract has to be diluted 300,000-fold before the capsaicin present is unnoticeable.

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This is a number that promises a world of “flavor and pain.” I’ve got to say, they’re on point with the description. While chowing down, I didn’t really believe the pain part, but there was a post-meal afterburn that lingered for about thirty minutes.

Maybe that’s because I was a little liberal with my usage, but I just couldn’t help myself. I’m a sucker for jerk sauce; the name just makes me nuts. Rectal Rocket Fuel Hot Sauce’s incarnation is a rich dark burgundy, about the same color as your average barbecue sauce, and has a thick consistency for hot sauce. It dripped slow out of the bottle into my homemade chicken and rice–I only added about four drops. The fifth I applied express to my tongue via fingertip–it had a resonant flavor, bold and brutal.

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Ah yes, the joy that is the cleverly named hot sauce. In contrast to some of the more crass, middle school named hot sauces out there, Colon Cleaner Hot Sauce actually made me laugh. It has the look of a classic vaudevillian elixir – the kind sold out of the back of a’41 Chevy. It’s got a kindly looking old man on it and somewhere in that bottle is a pretty decent hot sauce, even if it doesn’t live up to its namesake’s claim.

The goal of these hot sauces is ironically to call in the few who are looking for something so powerful they can barely stay standing, their bowels turned to jelly. Professor Phardtpounder’s Colon Cleaner Hot Sauce is not one of those sauces. It’s a relatively medium level hot sauce with the kind of kick you would want from a table hot sauce. There are no eyedroppers for application or “dilute first” notices on this sauce. Continue Reading