Colon Cleaner Hot Sauce Review
Ah yes, the joy that is the cleverly named hot sauce. In contrast to some of the more crass, middle school named hot sauces out there, Colon Cleaner Hot Sauce actually made me laugh. It has the look of a classic vaudevillian elixir – the kind sold out of the back of a’41 Chevy. It’s got a kindly looking old man on it and somewhere in that bottle is a pretty decent hot sauce, even if it doesn’t live up to its namesake’s claim.
The goal of these hot sauces is ironically to call in the few who are looking for something so powerful they can barely stay standing, their bowels turned to jelly. Professor Phardtpounder’s Colon Cleaner Hot Sauce is not one of those sauces. It’s a relatively medium level hot sauce with the kind of kick you would want from a table hot sauce. There are no eyedroppers for application or “dilute first” notices on this sauce.
The sauce itself is made with Scotch Bonnet Peppers. These little guys are great because they tend to make for some of the best tasting sauces around. Along with other Caribbean style sauces, they don’t always offer the hottest options around, but as a standard recipe, you’ll find a lot more flavor than you’d expect. In Professor Phardtpounder’s formula, you’ll find a pleasant mustard taste that is hard to find in solid hot sauces.
While hot mustards are a popular product of their own, they often consist primarily of mustard, followed by pepper extracts. This sauce is primarily pepper followed by mustard and the taste reflects that. Instead of a nostril clearing hot mustard, you get the light application of hot sauce with the strong, deep flavor of mustard, a personal favorite of mine. Of course, for those that are not fans of mustard, this might not be the best sauce for you.
Because it was mustard though, I went for the simplest, most intoxicating thing I could think of – a good old chicken sandwich. I use mustard on nearly everything in some manner or another. Catsup is a bit too sweet for me so mustard was always the fail safe and more than anything else I love a good mustard lathered sandwich with grilled chicken.
Colon Cleaner Hot Sauce, when applied moderately to a good sandwich is incredibly good. Because it’s a bit thicker than and not nearly as hot as other hot sauce options out there, you can lather up your bread fairly decently, augmenting it with mayo or more mustard. The taste is immediately apparent and the heat never quite overwhelming. Sitting in the middle of the hot sauce scale, Phardtpounder’s is perfect for pouring on nearly anything considered finger food.
Of course, there are obvious road blocks for this sauce. If you don’t like mustard, it’s not going to kill you, but you likely won’t enjoy it as much as you could. Similarly, any dishes that wouldn’t taste good with mustard – pizza, barbeque, etc – don’t quite fit in with the taste of this sauce. But on a good sandwich, I’m more than willing to recommend Professor Phardtpounder’s Colon Cleaner Hot Sauce.
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